I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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