I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize