Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
