idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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