Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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