whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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