It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
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Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
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I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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