Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
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