Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
