You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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