found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
