Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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