Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
