Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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