where am i from again
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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