Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
