Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize