The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize