people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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