i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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