The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Enjoy the penises
im on a boat
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