I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
