So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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