I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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