apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize