So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
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I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
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You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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