That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
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