so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
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my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
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No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
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