coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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