Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Randomize
