You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
