I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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