Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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