I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize