Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
He better not be in your backpack
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
