It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
porn star boner night. come get it.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
