why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize