Tell her she can't have a vagina
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
