He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
