Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
