Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
last night I used snow as a chaser
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
