She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
