I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
