After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I cut my penus on the lid.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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