I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
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