dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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