Swine flu. Run for my life!
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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