So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize