You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
