Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
