i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
